Be wise enough to choose your career 

The real big question for everyone is that, “what am I going to become in future?” - in other words, it is, what career do I have to choose for myself to be successful in life? This is in fact a strenuously tricky task - not because of that we don’t have sufficient opportunities but because of the surprising fact, that,- we have got a huge variety of opportunities! We are now living in a world that surrounds us with loads of information whether we need it or not. The media (mainstream as well social) is always there to tempt us towards one thing this day and towards another thing the next day. So we get startled when we start to think about choosing our career. In this article let us explore and analyze the process of career selection.

The main things that come in this process are, the factors that affects our thought pattern positively or negatively towards a particular study or job, the ways and methods that we ought to follow to achieve a successful outcome out of this process and some important elements that we have to keep in mind before and during the entire process. Let’s see one by one and then we can come to a definite conclusion.

The first thing we discuss here is the factors that affect our thought pattern to a significant level  while thinking upon choosing one’s career. Generally our ideas are either created or modified by the ideas and inputs that we learn from our neighborhoods, relatives and acquaintances. Most of us do not think broadly and we hardly search for diverse opportunities. And moreover, many of us are hesitant to think out of the box. We believe that what we hear and see in our surroundings is the complete facts of the entire world. “See, your cousin has settled well with this degree, see my colleague’s son has got a lucrative job studying this and that degree”,- these are the dialogues we use as a scale for selecting the study which is going to determine our happiness, satisfaction, gratification and financial status. Do you think that these kinds of observations are all enough to establish yourself in the niche of time?

Career is not a simple thing which can be easily changed time to time. Once you choose it, it is going to be one of the most important parts of your life. If it is not chosen rightly in the right time you will feel that always something is missing in your life! Because, you can feel fulfilled only when you feel gratification, proud and a sense of achievement in what you do. Otherwise, your job will seem to you as a big burden that sucks all your energy and enthusiasm. So, it becomes highly essential to think upon putting yourself in a well thought out study or job.

When we talk about a ‘good’ career, the first thing that comes to many people’s minds is the money that the career can yield. Considering a career only in terms of money is a single dimensional thinking and it is not a complete one.  You can choose the best suited career for you once you realize what you really want out of your career. Because, a career has many purposes other than money. To say shortly, a job can support you financially, it can be a fantastic play ground to practice your passion, it works as a platform to help people to come out of their problems, it may create loveable changes in other people’s lives, it can act as the pedestal to keep you as the most successful person on the earth! You are the one who must decide what to value and how to value, in your life.  Before deciding upon a career as good or bad, consider the above factors first and thus you can find out what you have to become. Money is one of the most fundamental thing in our life, but keep in mind, it is only fundamental, and there are so many other things that make us feel we are living our life.

Our job is going to be the biggest part of our life. It is going to be the only single thing which will take the longest part of our time. It is going to be our identity in our society. So, definitely we must think that what will happen if the longest part will not give us anything such as gratification, sense of pride, appreciation, recognition, and a place for our passion,- except money. The temptations that we get from our surroundings may hide these aspects of life from our eyes. But these are the most essential things that we have to consider while selecting a career. We should be really bold in selecting a career that we like, only then we can defeat the temptations around us.

A truly successful career has these two main elements. One is, I must follow my passion instead of becoming prey to popular choices; the other one is, how I am going to make my passion beneficial to the society. If we can maintain a perfect balance between these two things then your job will be the loveliest one for you.  You ought not to sacrifice your passion for the sake of money and at the same time you must not forget to make it a useful one for the people. You have to think about it to make it happen.

Pursuing your passion - instead of going behind the popular belief, is the best possible way that will make you feel as a successful person in future. You are not born to be the one among the masses; you are entirely different from others. Your career success relies on your capability of realizing this basic fact. If you are still doubtful about career choices, you can go for a career tour around your locality. You may visit the work places, shops, factories, commercial establishments, concert halls, other countries’ offices in your town and then you can work it out with the help of your parents and teachers. The world always gives you in abundance, be grateful to it, find out your choice and discover yourself. All the best, for your successful career journey!

Already Published in an online educational blog.

TALK - TO WIN HEARTS!

Have you ever wondered what it takes to win the hearts of others? In my experience, it is just listening to people when they are speaking their heart, - their feelings, and their problems. When I was in my thirties, when people narrated their problems to me, many a time I had understood it as they were searching for solutions. And, I had done the bad mistake of prescribing them solutions for their problems. I have wondered when they seem to be very disappointed even after they had accepted it as a good solution. Very lately I realized that people do not come to me for solution but they are in search of caring ears to listen to their problems that are trying to push out the first drop of their tears. Since then I started to give my people only a single solution,- in fact, for all the problems! -  And that is, listening, just listening to them patiently. People around us are in dire need of an ear that will patiently listen to what they speak out. If it happens to be your ear, then, you are the person who is very near to their heart.

A lively listening is the good medicine for many hearts that are aching with day to problems in family, relationships and in profession. Allow them just ten to fifteen minutes of your time to tell you their stories, and you can find, - that you have played a central role in reinstating the happiness again in the atmosphere around you. People don’t need solutions for their problem, they just want to vent out their desperate emotions culminated from the emotional complications they have come through.

Roughly Ten years ago, incidentally, I happened to meet a nice lady who is a practicing psychologist. While talking to her I asked her why I was unable to convince my wife even  though I help her find solutions for the problems (which I thought so). She gave me a simple reply that brought in a drastic change in the way I behave with people.  She said ‘We, the trainers, are accustomed and even trained our minds to give solutions for the problems of the client. Doing so, we forget our normal self and tend to give solutions to everything people tell us instead of just listening to them’. I was completely stunned, what a simple thing, but capable of changing the entire course of life! And after that incident I am now able to differentiate between the situations, when to listen for giving a solutions and when to listen for winning the heart next to me.

In my experience I have felt the importance of listening in two ways. The first one is listening to the words people speak. I believe most of us are very well capable of doing this kind of listening. Remembering the data they speak, the places they mention, the sequence of events they follow and the dates and times becomes possible by this kind of listening.  This kind of listening can be counted as a potential skill; but, to win the hearts of others, this kind of listening can help only a little. There is another kind of listening which is going to help us in this regard and that is, listening beyond words! Beyond words!?  What’s the strange stuff? It’s nothing but mixing our friendliness, kindness and care with the skill that we have already. Sometimes, particularly in male and female relationship, the words from the woman may sound as sharp, unnecessary for the situation and hurting for the man in the relationship and thus starts a bitter verbal ugliness.

But, if the male can (probably it’s rare) observe the emotion behind her words and not the words she has spoken certainly there will be another blossom in their relationship. When a woman says to a man “you have disappointed me” it actually does not mean that the man is incapable of fulfilling her expectations as if most of the men understand. It may also mean that you have to sit with her for a friendly chat, for a shopping with you, to have a trip to the nearby beach. But to understand this kind of meaning, we have to listen beyond the words. People with this kind of listening are the most successful people when it comes to the matter of keeping good relationship.

Listen more and talk less is a popular wording that we often hear. Some say that, only for fulfilling that purpose we have two ears but only one mouth. But what we can understand now is, when you empathetically listen to somebody, we ought to restrict our own thoughts and opinions to the minimum levels possible. Instead of that, we may show, by our words and by some acknowledging questions,- that we are listening to them. We should have the wisdom of choosing questions that do not embarrass them even to the slightest level. This shows that that we have good respect on them and, that sense of respect is the key to develop their love on you.

In my observation, very little things are needed for a happy life, but those little things are very delicate too. We must train ourselves to handle such delicate things like listening, with utmost care and thus we can create a joyous atmosphere that is filled with lovely people who are always for us and with us.